Monday, June 22, 2009

Our Baby Girl is 3!!!

Well today is Madison's birthday. Our first precious baby is three now. It is amazing all the things that happens in a child's first few years. After having carried my first born for the short 9 months but seemingly long at times, and reading all that occurs in those 9 months I found that every time a healthy child is born, it is truly a beautiful miracle. Jason and I have been very fortunate throughout the 6 years we have been married but nothing compares to the two miracles that have been given to us...Our precious Madison and our sweet boy, Jonas. There's nothing like looking at your own kids and knowing that they are yours forever. I can't imagine my life without them, and luckily no matter what happens here on this earth, I know that I can always be with them. I can remember my very first day as a mother. It was something that only happens once, no matter how many children you have, you never have that day like that one again b/c from that point on, you are always a mother. I remember when they handed her over to me. I stared at her and checked her like I think all mom's do. But after a few moments, I rememeber feeling guilt b/c I just didn't feel like she was mine. I didn't feel like I was her mother. I loved her but I didn't LOVE her. Well I guess it was more like I had love for her but I didn't truly love her yet. I hadn't fell in love with her yet. Oh how three years changes all that. Of course it didn't take 3 years, I don't think it even took 3 days. It was a love that grew faster than anything that I have or ever will experience in this life. A love for your children, I believe that is a miracle too. Just how a mother can start to love a little stranger in just a matter of minutes. I'm so glad that I have been blessed enough to have children and to have a relationship, bond, and a love with them that you can't have with anyone else.
I know that Maddie can't read but this is for her. Maddie girl, I love you. I love you so much that even that isn't enough. But you'll understand one day when you are a mommy. I'm so glad that you are the one that Heavenly Father sent to me b/c you make me so happy. I love the way you smile and when you are silly and funny. I love your hugs and kisses and it makes me so happy when you tell me that you love me. I can't wait for the days that we can talk about your day and you can depend on me when you need someone to listen or just a shoulder to cry on. I will hold you until your last tear has dropped. I want to be your friend but mostly, I want to be your mother. You are like no one else. No matter how many brothers or sisters you may have, always know that you are important and loved. I will always need MY Maddie in my life. Well I could go on for days about how much I love you and what you mean to me but I'll save it for next year maybe.

For my blog readers, here are pictures of Maddie on each of her birthdays.

I'm sure you can tell that this was taken on her BIRTH day. Just minutes old!

Madison's 1 st birthday and party!! It was on a Saturday so her party was actually on her birthday.

Madison's 2nd Birthday Sad to say, I didn't take any pictures of her on her actual birthday but this was taken at her party (June 21).

Happy 3rd Birthday, Bug!!
Mommy loves you!!!